I have a recurrence of my bladder cancer (see The ‘C’ Word) and once again I am documenting my experience.
On September 10, I went for my routine follow-up cystoscopy. Normally, you go every 3 months, then every 6, then once a year as long as the scans are clean. I was clean for two years as of last year, so this was my first yearly visit. This was my log entry when I got home.
I’m no longer worried about my liver, but now I’m dealing with a new worry: my bladder tumor is back. I’m still in a state of shock, and I need to come to terms with my anxiety. Dr. Gervasi showed me what looked like a “bump of bubbles” on the wall of my bladder and said it appeared suspicious. My next appointment is on October 7 for another TURBT. We won’t know anything more until the pathology report comes back. The fact that it’s so small and not causing any symptoms is good, but a second recurrence within the last year is not so good. I remember a podcast where the host mentioned having several TURBT surgeries because every time she went back, they found another growth.
At this point, I’m just trying to contain my anxiety. We found something before there were symptoms, and I have an appointment to have it removed. At this point, I’ll deal with whatever happens next. What else am I going to do?
After lunch, we went to Willie’s Farm Market (because now I have yet another motivator for eating better) and picked up my post-cystoscopy antibiotics from Drug Mart.
October 7, I went for surgery. It was very much like the last time except this time I left the surgical center with a catheter. I’m not sure whether I needed one, but this was a different surgeon (and surgical team) and it was already in when I woke up from anesthesia.
I posted the below on Facebook after I got home and the pain meds were kicking in.
Warning: I’m on good pain meds, so if you feel offended by anything I post over the next week or so – no you don’t.
- If you ever pee blood, make a Dr appointment ASAP. Women are especially susceptible to misdiagnosis because blood down there is not as rare and shocking as it is to men.
- This is my second recurrence of tumors in my bladder. The first was in 2022. It took four months to get diagnosed at that time. Be your own advocate and push for answers if you’re not satisfied with what you’re being told.
- Bladder cancer is frequently recurrent. I was already set for regular screenings for the rest of my life after the first one. Get used to it. Even if I’m clean for a long period of time, it’s cancer, why stop screenings?
- I’ve never had a catheter. Peeing in a bag is weird. Not having to get up to pee is fun. For now.
More advocacy and fun stories as the pain meds allow. Know that I’m reading all the comments on Carrie Hawley’s post as well, and I appreciate all the well-wishes. If you want to do something for me – make that appointment, get that colonoscopy, don’t ignore “mystery blood” coming from where it doesn’t normally come from. Take care of yourself.
Shout out to the best nurses in the world: Carrie Hawley and Ashley Marie Hawley. I love you girls. Thank you for everything.
Luckily, I did not have the 4 month run-around I experienced in 2022 getting diagnosed. To say that I was surprised with the findings is a huge understatement. We had vacation planned at the end of September, and I was wrapping up work projects in preparation for that when I got this unexpected news.
It did a lot of soul-searching and decided to enjoy vacation in the interim. A friend at work told me a saying he lives by:
If you know you’re going to suffer in the future, don’t start now
So, here I am post-surgery, peeing in bag attached to my leg. I’ll know more in another week. Hoping for the best, but not naive enough to be unprepared for the alternative.